Here I am again, another insomnia night. Everyone can tell, as long as I'm into the dark night, I always think too much, especially tonight while listening to Michael Bublé's songs (Put your head on my shoulder, Lost, End of may, Best of me). I don't understand myself now, I can't decide what I want or what I need, I'm wasting my life time, standstill here and many of my friends out there are catching their chances, and move on.
Some of them often remind me of the value of me, that I have my very own ability/talent/potentiality. but why do I not know what I am or who I want to be? and how can I live my this gay life which I did not any chance to choose? and when will I escape this terrible place to anywhere else where is always better than here? I'm on my way to answer those obsessed questions.
I know I have to be stronger because of fate's decision, but you know, sometimes it's too hard for me to handle. May I just give up?
To myself: never listen to MB at night again !!!